Written by: Sheila Tolley
Good morning to all you Loyal Republicans who have gathered here this morning.
[I will pause while our new sheriff, WT (walking tall) escorts Jeff Flake out of the auditorium.]
Thanks, WT. I appreciate your being polite to Mr. Flake. We would not want any undue stress to cause his nose to get out of joint. I assume you allowed Mr. Flake to take the stairs in lieu of the elevator. Since he was so terrified by two girls in the elevator last week, I am afraid he may develop a fear of flying and need to seek professional help in 36 years or so.
Now let’s get to our new business for today. First and foremost, I want you people to be more gentle in your conversations about Julie Swetnick. As you know, Julie is the latest #metoo/lyingslut who has crawled out of the cockroach nest. The new graduates of Me TOO UNIVERSITY (ME2U) are not required to meet any standards. They are just required to show up at the designated place, scream like angry spider monkeys and pick up their check from George Soros.
Why do I urge you to be gentle with Julie Swetnick? She has come forward to tell us in her very own words about her tragic young life. It does not take a doctorate degree to understand why she needed to hire the Reptilian Creepy Porn Lawyer, Michael Avenatti, for her defense.
Just walk in her “Go Fund Me” shoes for a moment. Do you realize how much this woman has been humiliated?
Evidently, in her youth…..this girl was so HOMELY…that she had to attend TEN different rape parties before the conductor would sell her a ticket on The Rape Train. She said it, not me.
After all is said and done….. the Democrats can relax knowing…..
“there is always one more Cockroach slithering around the corner.”