Archive | March 1, 2019

Blonde On Board

 

A plane is on its way to Toronto , when a blonde in economy class gets up and moves to the first class section and sits down.

The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket.

She then tells the blonde that she paid for economy class and that she will have to sit in the back.

The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Toronto and I’m staying right here.”

The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the pilot and the co-pilot that there is a blonde bimbo sitting in first class, that belongs in economy and won’t move back to her seat.

The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for economy she will have to leave and return to her seat.

The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Toronto and I’m staying right here.”

The co-pilot tells the pilot that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest this blonde woman who won’t listen to reason.

The pilot says, “you say she is a blonde? I’ll Handle this, I’m married to a blonde. I speak blonde.”

He goes back to the blonde and whispers in her ear, and she says, “oh, I’m sorry.” And gets up and goes back to her seat in economy.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss.

“I told her, ‘first class isn’t going to Toronto.”

 

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Brains

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where a family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.
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“I’m afraid I’m the bearer of bad news, he said as he surveyed the worried faces. The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It’s an experimental procedure, very risky, but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the BRAIN.”
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The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a time, someone asked, ‘How much will a brain cost?’
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The doctor quickly responded, “$5,000 for a Democrat’s brain; $200 for a Republican’s brain.”
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The moment turned awkward. Some of the Democrats actually had to ‘try’ to not smile, avoiding eye contact with the Republicans. A man unable to control his curiosity, finally blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, “Why is the Democrats brain so much more than a Republicans brain?”
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The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, “It’s just standard pricing procedure. We have to price the Republicans brains a lot lower because they’ve been used.”
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SEND THIS TO A SMART Republican WHO NEEDS A LAUGH, AND TO ANY Democrat WHOM YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!
[won’t be many]

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The Left must be stopped

WRITTEN BY: BILL BOWSER…FROM CINCINNATI, OHIO

I just read a news item about former Vice President, Joe Biden (best known for putting his foot in his mouth) being criticized by what are called “usually friendly” sources, which means the left-leaning mainstream fake news media (MSFNM), for calling the current Vice President, Mike Pence a “decent guy”. (If ever there was a decent guy in the Republican Party it is Pence.) When confronted for this unforgivable sin Good Ol’ Joe quickly back pedaled, and said that’s not what he meant. Heaven forbid.

Apparently it is now inappropriate for any Democrat to say anything that could be construed as “nice” about any conservative. This party of inclusion, that preaches tolerance for all sorts of miscreants and abhorrent behavior considers Republicans and conservatives to be no more than punching bags, or maybe the equivalent of cockroaches. These are the people who claim that being conservative means one is bigoted, racist, sexist, homophobic, and numerous other derogatory terms.

Has it occurred to you that you can usually tell what the Left is really doing by listening to what they accuse the conservatives of doing? These people who can’t look at a group of people without counting how many minorities are among it, and complaining if their quotas aren’t satisfied, don’t believe that conservatives aren’t the ones who make race-based decisions.

I’ve long thought that some conservative should demand that the MSFNM be made to demonstrate the validity of their libelous assertion that conservatives are such vile creatures, by seeking a few of them out on the street. After all, if they are so numerous it shouldn’t be difficult to find great numbers of them in public, because they represent more than half of the population.

I don’t know about you folks, but I’m sick and tired of these MSFNM nitwits accusing me of such vile nonsense. That’s one of the reasons I got rid of my TV many years ago. We conservatives need to become more politically active. We need to stop accepting the mistreatment at the hands of the Left. While they stage fake attacks on themselves as in the case of Jussie Smollett, which they attribute to conservatives, their minions freely attack anyone wearing a MAGA ball cap.

We have to stand up and be counted. As Howard Beale said in the 1975 film classic Network, “I’m mad as Hell, and I’m not going to take it anymore”. Although I’m a strong advocate for anger management, I think an exception is justified here. The Left must be stopped.

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FYI….”Well, mercy me….it appears that AOC may have her thongs all twisted up and Pelosi may have gotten her Granny Panties in a wad. The very idea that  representatives might vote as the district who elected them expects them to vote….AOC has already put them on the list for her pit bulls to destroy.” -Sheila Tolley-

 

https://www.politico.com/story/2019/02/28/nancy-pelosi-house-democrats-1195854

 

THE SPHINX—-BIDNESS

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Vote Democratic, here is part of their plan.  They say virtually all Americans will be covered.  Does that include congress and all federal employees ?

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/guybenson/2019/02/28/more-than-100-house-dems-our-healthcare-bill-will-basically-eliminate-private-coverage-eliminate-up-to-two-million-jobs-and-cover-abortion-n2542282

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The Editor:  Do we need to check  ” Spell Check “,  LL ?

Language Cat:  No, bidness is an old minority pronunciation of business, the Democrats are using a bunch of improper English to appeal to the new generation of idiots.  Here is a great idea, but if the new phones get much bigger we can just use tablets.  The never, never, never, ever things to do are buy any electronics made in China.  All information goes straight to the Chinese Communist.  Never buy a $2000.00  ( two-thousand ) dollar phone.

https://www.reuters.tv/v/PgCe/2019/02/25/folding-phones-makers-pray-you-ll-want-one

Don’t fall for the 5G hype.

https://gizmodo.com/5g-is-going-to-be-an-incredibly-tough-sell-in-2019-1832771232

Real stores are fighting back.

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-retail-pickup-analysis/how-u-s-retailers-turn-their-bane-into-boon-with-click-and-collect-idUSKCN1QE1VE

Truckers are changing.

https://www.benzinga.com/news/19/02/13145222/truck-stop-owners-feeling-the-high-tech-heat?utm_campaign=mixi.media&utm_source=mixi.media&utm_medium=feed&utm_content=site&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=mixi&utm_campaign=benzinga

As usual the best/secure jobs are high ranking government positions.

https://hotair.com/archives/2019/02/24/maxine-waters-apologizes-whiny-millennials-looking-jobs/

http://act.rootsaction.org/p/dia/action/public/?action_KEY=7309

Astronomy Picture of the Day

A Charioteer’s Comet
Image Credit & Copyright: Rolando Ligustri (CARA Project, CAST)

Explanation: Still racing across planet Earth’s night skies, Comet Iwamoto (C/2018 Y1) shares this pretty telescopic field of view with stars and nebulae of northern constellation Auriga, the Charioteer. Captured on February 27, Iwamoto’s greenish coma and faint tail appear between a complex of reddish emission nebulae and open star cluster M36 (bottom right). The reddish emission is light from hydrogen gas ionized by ultraviolet radiation from hot stars near the region’s giant molecular cloud some 6,000 light-years distant. The greenish glow from the comet, less than 5 light-minutes away, is predominantly emission from diatomic carbon molecules fluorescing in sunlight. M36, one of Auriga’s more familiar star clusters, is also a background object far beyond the Solar System, about 4,000 light-years away. Comet Iwamoto passed closest to Earth on February 12 and is outward bound in a highly elliptical orbit that will carry it beyond the Kuiper belt. With an estimated orbital period of 1,317 years it should return to the inner Solar System in 3390 AD.

Tomorrow’s picture: butterfly and scorpion