History of Man, Beer and the Wheel

Image result for pic of man beer and wheel

The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel.

Beer required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture.

Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That’s how villages were formed.

The wheel was invented to get man to the beer and vise versa.

These two were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:

1. Liberals.
2. Conservatives.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement.

Other men who were less skilled at hunting (called ‘vegetarians’ which was an early human word meaning ‘bad hunter’) learned to live off the Conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ’s and doing the sewing, fetching, and hairdressing. This was the beginning of the liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men evolved into women. Others became known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that Conservatives provided.

Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons.

Modern Liberals like lite beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare. Another interesting evolutionary side note: many liberal women have higher testosterone levels than their men.

Most college professors, social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, film makers in Hollywood, group therapists and community organizers are liberals. Liberals meddled in our national pastime and invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn’t fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink real beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are members of the military, big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, engineers, corporate executives, athletes, airline pilots, and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other Conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when Conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Here ends today’s lesson in world history. It should be noted that a liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily respond to this post.

A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth of this history that it will be shared immediately to other true believers and to just piss-off more liberals.

And there you have it. Let your next action reveal your true self, I’m going to grab a few beers and BBQ some steaks!


Thomas Jefferson…What a man!!!

Image result for pic of thomas jefferson

Thomas Jefferson was a very remarkable man who started learning very early in life and never stopped.
At 5, began studying under
his cousin’s tutor.
At 9, studied Latin,
Greek and French.
At 14, studied
classical literature
and additional languages.
At 16, entered
the College of William and Mary.
Also could write in Greek with one hand,
while writing the same in Latin with the other.
At 19, studied
Law for 5 years
starting under George Wythe.
At 23, started
his own law practice.
At 25, was elected to the
Virginia House of Burgesses.
At 31, wrote the widely circulated
“Summary View of the Rights of British America,” and retired from his law practice.
At 32, was a delegate
to the Second Continental Congress.
At 33, wrote the
Declaration of Independence.
At 33, took three years to revise
Virginia’s legal code and wrote a
Public Education bill and a statute for Religious Freedom.
At 36, was elected the second
Governor of Virginia, succeeding Patrick
At 40, served in
Congress for two years.
At 41, was the American minister to France
and negotiated commercial treaties with
European nations
along with
Ben Franklin and John Adams.
At 46, served as the first
Secretary of State
under George Washington.
At 53, served as Vice President
and was elected President of the
American Philosophical Society.
At 55, drafted the Kentucky Resolutions
and became the active head of the
Republican Party.
At 57, was elected the third president
of the United States.
At 60, obtained the Louisiana Purchase,
doubling the nation’s size.
At 61, was
elected to a second term as President.
At 65, retired to Monticello.
At 80, helped President Monroe
shape the Monroe Doctrine.
At 81, almost
single-handedly, created the University of Virginia and served as its first
At 83, died on the
50th Anniversary of the Signing of
the Declaration of Independence,
along with John Adams.
Thomas Jefferson knew, because he himself studied, the previous failed attempts at government.
He understood actual history, the nature of God, His laws and the nature of man. That happens to be way more than what most understand
Jefferson really knew his stuff…
A voice from the
past to lead us in the future:
John F. Kennedy held a dinner in the White House for a group of the brightest minds in the nation at that time. He made this statement:
“This is perhaps the assembly of the most intelligence ever to gather at one time in the White House, with the exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone”
“When we get piled upon one another in large cities, as in Europe,
we shall become as corrupt as Europe.”
“The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not.”
“It is incumbent on every generation to pay its own debts as it goes.
A principle which if acted on, would save
one-half the wars of the world.”
“I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people, under the pretense of taking care of them.”
“My reading of history convinces me that
most bad government results from
too much government.”
“No free man shall ever be
debarred the use of arms.”
“The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms
is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government.”

One More Reason To Shop At Cosco

Image result for cartoon pic of purina nuggets

Yesterday I was at Costco, buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Owen, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a
woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an

So because I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again.

I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last time, that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV’s in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet
and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with
Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.
The food is nutritionally complete, (certified), so it works well and
I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically
everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive
care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I had stopped
to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

Well, I thought the guy behind her was going to have
a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won’t let me shop there anymore. Better watch
what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to
think of crazy things to say.

Forward this (especially) to all your retired
friends… it will be their laugh for the day.








The Editor:   Is this about the Twin Towers or the Twin Cities, LL ?

Baby Cat:  No, it’s about twin babies and a little of their thoughts in their mother’s womb.

Twin Red:  Do we have souls ?

Twin Blue:  We sure do, that’s why we hold hands.

TR:  I sure hope our mother doesn’t do cocaine, alcohol, and the other poisons.  I’m just getting big enough to kick.

TB:  That’s for sure,  I hope our parents don’t do a partial birth abortion and suck our brains out before we are delivered.

TR:   The Planned Parenthood Group is big on that.  They can sell our flesh, but we will always have our souls.

TB:  Why do the Americans want illegal kids from anywhere and kill defenseless babies.

TR:   They lost their souls. 



The Republicans chose Charlotte for their 2020 convention.   The DemocRATs  will meet in Havana, Cuba.


The Editors:  Who is joking, LL ?

San Jose Cat:   Those Californians are such jokers.

Adidas is helping with the plastic problem.

A fortune has been found.

Here are the Progressives/DemocRATS  trying to see  WHO  to charge with treason.

Track replaces baseball today.  This movie was produced by Dodi Fayed who was killed with Princess Diana, in the car crash.


The Editor:   What is new with money, LL ?

McScrouge Cat:  Here are some links to money articles.

Some immigrants show their appreciation of their new homes.



This is the Progressives’ latest hero,  after Hillgal, Pocahontas, Maxine, Oprah, oh, I almost forgot the last big time Socialist Democrat ( Adolph Hitler ).


The Editor:   Is there anything interesting, LL ?

Technology Cat:  There sure is, here are some new x-rays.

This public official wants to tell you how to dress.

This is what made America great.

Airlines will soon do away with pilots.

This guy should be fired for being greedy.