A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller’s name is Patricia Whack. So he says, “Ms. Whack, I’d like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation.”
Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.
The frog says $30,000.
The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it’s OK, he knows the bank manager.
Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.
The frog says, “Sure. I have this,” and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patti explains that she’ll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says “There’s a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral.” She holds up the tiny pink elephant. “I mean, what the heck is this?”
The bank manager looks back at her and says:
“It’s a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”
A man spoke to each of his 3 sons when he sent them to college. “I feel it’s my duty to provide you with the best possible education, and you do not owe me anything for that. However, I want you to appreciate it. As a gesture of appreciation, please each put $1,000 into my coffin when I die.” And so it happened.
His sons became a doctor, a financial planner and a lawyer, each successful financially. When their father died and they saw him in the coffin, they remembered his wish.
The doctor stacked 10 crisp $100 bills onto the chest of the deceased father.
The financial planner placed $1,000 there in 20 crisp $50 bills.
Finally, it was the heartbroken lawyer’s turn. He slowly reached into his pocket, removed his checkbook, wrote a check for $3,000, put it into his father’s coffin, and took the $2,000 cash. The lawyer is now in Congress, probably from your district.
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