Archive | April 2021

Top 8 Idiots Of The Year!

 

1. AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it’s not Walter who’s lacking intelligence.

 

 2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in  Oakland, CA spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home.  After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, ‘Please come out and give yourself up.’

 

 3. WHAT WAS PLAN B?  An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

  

4. THE GETAWAY!  A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer.  Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.

  

  5. DID I SAY THAT?  Police in  Los Angeles  had good luck with a robbery
suspect who just couldn’t control himself during a lineup.  When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words:  ‘Give me all your money or I’ll shoot’, the man shouted, ‘that’s not what I said!’

 

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?  A man spoke frantically into the phone: ‘My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart’.  ‘Is this her first child?’ the doctor asked.  ‘No!’ the man shouted, ‘This is her  husband!’

   

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!  In  Modesto, CA,  Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon.  King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun.  Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.  (hellooooooo…!!!)

 

8. THE GRAND FINALE!  Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of  Bakersfield, CA,  some folks, new to boating, were having a problem.  No matter how hard they tried, they couldn’t get their brand new 22 foot boat, going.  It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied.  After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong.  A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition.  The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and pitch.  So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.  Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer!

 

Now remember, these are all true stories and these people vote and most have children!

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THE SPHINX—NOT SO FAST

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Check your local weather.

https://weather.com/news/weather/video/coastal-low-to-bring-wind-cold-and-snow

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Maybe this is why Daunte didn’t want to be questioned.

https://nypost.com/2021/04/13/daunte-wright-was-facing-attempted-robbery-case-when-killed-by-cop/

https://nypost.com/2021/04/13/over-400k-raised-for-family-of-shooting-victim-daunte-wright/

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This has a certain sense of planning.  Kamala gets federal civilian employees to work the Border Patrol jobs, that frees up the Border Patrol to go to Guatemala and stop the illegals in their own country.  Everyone knows the Drug Cartel members and MS 13 gang killers have more members in America than Central America.  The Border Patrol are safer in Central America.  Don’t forget Cujo, arf, arf.

https://www.fedsmith.com/2021/04/12/efforts-growing-to-recruit-federal-employees-to-work-at-southern-border/

https://www.breitbart.com/border/2021/04/13/exclusive-u-s-border-patrol-will-deploy-to-mexico-guatemala-bo

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Women should be aware of vaccine side effects.

https://nypost.com/2021/04/13/covid-19-vaccine-can-impact-mammogram-with-false-positive/

A new controversy.

https://nypost.com/2021/04/13/wyatt-pike-quits-american-idol-after-making-top-12/

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Trump is still on the job.

https://www.newsmax.com/newsfront/trump-2024-republicans-president/2021/04/10/id/1017105/

Are you sensitive ?

https://redstate.com/wag/2020/01/24/sensitivity-training-101-n126527

I hope this guy get 10 million for damages.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/leahbarkoukis/2021/04/13/brooklyn-center-city-manager-fired-n2587821

https://redstate.com/

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No world power depends on imports for vital products.  China owns our government.  Our businesses sold us out.

https://www.newsmax.com/politics/chips/2021/04/09/id/1017052/

https://thefederalist.com/

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Oz Editor:  Is that title from the Wizard Of Oz, LL ?

https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/5f90d7e1-c54a-48d3-bd3f-f0d770b1c7b9

Spanish Cat:  It is, but I’m talking about fast food.  It isn’t fast anymore.  If the stores get much more dangerous Nancy will put one of those fences/walls that don’t work around them. Amigo is learning Spanish from the directional or caution signs.

https://nypost.com/2021/04/08/video-shows-bronx-popeyes-customers-bashing-man-with-sign/

On this video he learned ” careful wet floor “.

https://www.amazon.com/Two-Sided-Caution-English-Signs-Tezzorio/dp/B07G5N23MG

Here is another not-so-fast-food stop.  Amigo learned some sign language on this one.  The employee signs you can’t use two coupons, then signs—when I count to dos I’m climbing out this window and beat your culo.

https://nypost.com/video/drive-thru-customer-attacked-by-employee-over-discount/

Pretty soon he will be able to communicate as well as Biden or Helen Keller.

This is still our all time most requested fast-food video.  The guy with the rebar was found innocent.  The two women were trying to pass counterfeit money.  Usually no good comes from that.

We need Russian women to train our service workers.  A better idea would be to put this woman in charge of Nancy.

Here are Nancy, Pocahontas, and AOC trying to see if all the votes were counted.

https://www.coasttocoastam.com/article/video-troop-of-monkeys-seen-roaming-around-cemetery-in-cincinnati/

The Constitution has finally had enough abuse.

https://babylonbee.com/news/constitution-comes-forward-to-accuse-joe-biden-of-assault

Biden’s Cujo dog hasn’t been in the news for a while, I sure hope he is OK.

https://nypost.com/2021/04/10/five-dog-tags-found-in-belly-of-south-carolina-monster-gator/

Alligators and dinosaurs have the same ancestors.  They are like democrats and monkeys. Few men could survive back then.

https://adventuredinosaurs.com/2020/08/02/are-alligators-related-to-dinosaurs/

 

Favorite Movie Quotes

“Go ahead, make my day.” Sudden Impact, 1983

“All right, Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up.” Sunset Blvd., 1950

“May the Force be with you.” Star Wars, 1977

“Fasten your seatbelts. It’s going to be a bumpy night.” All About Eve, 1950

“You talking to me?” Taxi Driver, 1976
Fun fact: Robert DeNiro improvised this line. The script only said “Travis speaks to himself in the mirror” so DeNiro took some liberties and was ultimately successful.

 

In A German Zoo

Had not thought of this aspect of COVID.  The animals love watching us as much as we love watching them. It it stimulation and we all NEED that!

During the pandemic, the animals in a zoo in Germany were depressed and never left their dens.

Nobody went there anymore, not children not adults.  The zoo remained empty. 

So the zookeeper called a pianist to play for them.  The pianist composed this piece specifically for the animals.
See what happened.

Astronomy Picture of the Day

The Galaxy, the Jet, and a Famous Black Hole
Image Credit: NASA, JPL-Caltech, Event Horizon Telescope Collaboration

Explanation: Bright elliptical galaxy Messier 87 (M87) is home to the supermassive black hole captured by planet Earth’s Event Horizon Telescope in the first ever image of a black hole. Giant of the Virgo galaxy cluster about 55 million light-years away, M87 is the large galaxy rendered in blue hues in this infrared image from the Spitzer Space telescope. Though M87 appears mostly featureless and cloud-like, the Spitzer image does record details of relativistic jets blasting from the galaxy’s central region. Shown in the inset at top right, the jets themselves span thousands of light-years. The brighter jet seen on the right is approaching and close to our line of sight. Opposite, the shock created by the otherwise unseen receding jet lights up a fainter arc of material. Inset at bottom right, the historic black hole image is shown in context, at the center of giant galaxy and relativistic jets. Completely unresolved in the Spitzer image, the supermassive black hole surrounded by infalling material is the source of enormous energy driving the relativistic jets from the center of active galaxy M87.

Tomorrow’s picture: pixels on the horizon