Ever since I was a child, I’ve always had a fear of someone under my bed at night. So I went to a shrink and told him: “I’ve got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there’s somebody under it. I’m scared. I think I’m going crazy.”

“Just put yourself in my hands for one year” said the shrink. “Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears.”

“How much do you charge?”

“Eighty dollars per visit,” replied the doctor.

“I’ll sleep on it,” I said.

Six months later the doctor met me on the street. “Why didn’t you come to see me about those fears you were having?” he asked.

“Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is $12,480.00.”

A bartender cured me for $10.00. I was so happy to have saved all that money, so I went and bought me a new pickup truck.

“Is that so?” With a bit of an attitude he said, “And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?

“He told me to cut the legs off the bed. Ain’t nobody under there now.”