Day: June 15, 2025

To All The Dads In Readerland

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Tolley’s Topics Wishes You A:

 

Father's Day Gif - Gif Abyss

The Wine Expert

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A wine merchant’s regular taster died and the director started looking for a new one to hire. A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came in to apply for the position.

The director of the winery wondered how to send him away. He gave him a glass to drink.

The drunk tried it and said: “It’s a Muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers. Low grade, but
acceptable.

“That’s correct”, said the boss. Another glass…. “It’s a cabernet, eight years old, a south-western slope, oak barrels, matured at 8 degrees. Requires three more years for finest results.”

“Correct.” A third glass… ”It’s a pinot blanch champagne, high grade and exclusive,” calmly said the drunk.

The director was astonished. He winked at his secretary, secretly suggesting something. She left the room, and came back in with a glass of urine. The alcoholic tried it.

“It’s a blonde, 26 years old, three months pregnant – and if I don’t get the job, I’ll name the father.”

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Estate Planning made simple

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Otis was a single guy, living at home with his father and working in the family business.  His father had been in poor health for years and doctors offered little hope that he would live another year.  Otis knew that he would inherit a fortune once his sickly father died. Otis wanted two things:

• to learn how to invest his inheritance and

• to find a wife to share his fortune.

One evening at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman  he had ever seen.  Her natural beauty took his breath away.

“I may look like just an ordinary man,” he said to her. “But, in just a year or so, my father will die, and I’ll inherit 15 million dollars.”

Impressed, the woman obtained his business card.

Then… Two weeks later she became his stepmother.

Women are so much better at estate planning than men…

 

BRITISH HUMOR….

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Flag of the United Kingdom | Britannica

These are classified ads, which were actually placed in U.K. Newspapers:

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old,
Hateful little bastard.
Bites!

FREE PUPPIES
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor’s dog.

FREE PUPPIES.
Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY !
Must sell washer and dryer £100.

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .
Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.

**** And the WINNER is… ****

FOR SALE BY OWNER.
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition, £200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

Bible Verse

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