A woman in a hot air balloon realizes she is lost. She lowers her altitude and spots a man fishing from a boat below. She shouts to him, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”

The man consults his portable GPS and replies, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

She rolls her eyes and says, “You must be a Republican!” “I am,” replies the man. “How did you know?” “Well,” answers the balloonist, “everything you tell me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, and I’m still lost. Frankly, you’re not much help to me.”

The man smiles and responds, “You must be a Democrat.” “I am, replies the balloonist. “How did you know?” “Well,” says the man, “You don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You’ve risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and now you expect me to solve your problem. You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it’s my fault.”

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Nancy Pelosi, Charles lll, and Xi Jinping all die and go to Hell. While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The Devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth. Xi Jinping asks to call China and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the Devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Xi writes him a check. 

Next, Charles lll calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When he is finished the Devil informs him that the cost is 6 million dollars, so he writes him a check. 

Finally, Pelosi gets her turn and talks for 4 hours. When finished, the Devil informs her that the cost is $5.00. 

When Xi Jinping hears this he goes ballistic and asks the Devil why Pelosi got to call the USA so cheaply. The Devil smiles and replies, “Since Biden took over, the country’s gone to hell, so it’s a local call.”

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