Day: December 17, 2025
No Free Rides
An old farmer drove to a neighbor’s and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door.
The farmer asked, “Is your Dad home?”
The boy replied, “No sir, he isn’t; he went to town.”
The farmer said, “Well, is your Mother here?”
The boy said, “No sir, she went to town with Dad.”
The farmer said, “How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?”
The boy said, “No sir, He went with Mom and Dad.”
The rancher stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, and mumbling to himself.
The boy said, “Is there anything I can do for you? I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give dad a message.”
“Well,” said the rancher uncomfortably, “I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It’s about your brother Howard getting my daughter, Suzie, pregnant.”
The boy thought for a moment, “You would have to talk to Dad about that. I know he charges $500 for the bull and $50 for the hog, but I don’t know how much he charges for Howard.”
Dealing with the Squirrels
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrel infestation. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded that the squirrels were predestined to be there, and they should not interfere with God’s divine will.
At the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistery and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.
The Lutheran church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist church. Two weeks later, the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water-slide.
The Episcopalians tried a much more unique path by setting out pans of whiskey around their church in an effort to kill the squirrels with alcohol poisoning. They sadly learned how much damage a band of drunk squirrels can do.
But the Catholic church came up with a more creative strategy! They baptized all the squirrels and made them members of the church Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.
Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue. They took the first squirrel and circumcised him. They haven’t seen a squirrel since.
Astronomy Picture of the Day
W5: The Soul Nebula
Image Credit & Copyright: Jeffrey Horne
Explanation: Stars are forming in the Soul of the Queen of Aethopia. More specifically, a large star forming region called the Soul Nebula can be found in the direction of the constellation Cassiopeia, whom Greek mythology credits as the vain wife of a King who long ago ruled lands surrounding the upper Nile river. Also known as Westerhout 5 (W5), the Soul Nebula houses several open clusters of stars, ridges and pillars darkened by cosmic dust, and huge evacuated bubbles formed by the winds of young massive stars. Located about 6,500 light years away, the Soul Nebula spans about 100 light years and is usually imaged next to its celestial neighbor the Heart Nebula (IC 1805). The featured image, taken from near Nashville, Tennessee, USA, is a composite of 234 hours of exposures made in different colors: red as emitted by hydrogen gas, yellow as emitted by sulfur, and blue as emitted by oxygen.
Tomorrow’s picture: Jupiter and the Geminids
Daily Wisecracks & Wisdom
Everything you’ve ever wanted
is on the other side of fear.
George Addair
THE SPHINX—ARCHIVED INTERESTING THINGS
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INTERNATIONAL NEWS
The Australian Hero.
Trump files a 10 BILLION lawsuit against the BBC.
NATIONAL INTERESTS
Judge Dugan’s trial started Monday.
https://townhall.com/tipsheet/amy-curtis/2025/12/15/hannah-dugan-trial-day-one-recap-n2667900
Trump gives the Reiners as much praise as possible. Trump was too kind in his eulogy. I hope Trump will be able to give Nancy a great eulogy when she goes to the place where there is no insider-trading. She still has no Soul.
https://townhall.com/tipsheet/mattvespa/2025/12/16/trump-doubles-down-on-reiner-post-n2667925
Reiner’s son is arrested for the murders.
If America had another stock market crash I wonder if society would be rebuilt for the better ?
May The Force be with you.
It is insider trading. They get information on laws effecting companies, ask Nancy.
Another Somali scam.
Get those rare earth minerals.
WE AREN’T SORRY.
The medical community is run like a Somali drug store.
https://townhall.com/tipsheet/amy-curtis/2025/12/12/covid-vaccines-heart-damage-n2667792
Disney is sorry for nothing.
Brown University in Rhode Island must have the same camera system as the prison where Epstein was killed.
CULTURE
Ms. Finland loses title for making an insensitive Chinese joke.
The Left-Democrats want your children to become homosexuals, have surgery, bind their breasts, and have a miserable life on the necessary drugs used to make them monsters.
https://townhall.com/tipsheet/amy-curtis/2025/12/12/nc-school-board-inappropriate-book-n2667797
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The History Editor: What is cat worthy today, LL ?
The Variety Cat: We have an assorted collection of one time interesting happenings. UCLA is first.
A young seal wants a Carlton Draught Beer.
https://redstate.com/wardclark/2025/12/07/so-a-seal-walks-into-a-bar-n2196903
One of our earliest saved videos.
A French horse not wanting to be saddled with Socialism.
AOC–for the people.
https://tolleystopics.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/13832.jpg
Trump has closed the border.
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Get a dog.
https://theonion.com/working-in-general-vicinity-for-8-hours-a-day-misinterp-1838142520/
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Don’t be fooled.
https://babylonbee.com/news/nigerian-prince-scammed-by-somali-immigrant
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