Splish Splash

PATRIOT POST MEMES

Whatta Whistle?

10 Best Tea Kettles for Gas Stoves in 2020 - Chef's Pencil

A man who had spent his whole life in the desert visited a friend. He’d never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the RR tracks, he heard a whistle, but didn’t know what it was. Predictably, he’s hit and is thrown to the side of the tracks. He had some minor internal injuries, a few broken bones, and some bruises.

After weeks in the hospital recovering, he’s at his friend’s house attending a party. While in the kitchen, he suddenly hears the teakettle whistling. He grabs a baseball bat from the nearby closet and proceeds to batter and bash the teakettle into an unrecognizable lump of metal. His friend, hearing the ruckus, rushes into the kitchen, sees what’s happened and asks the desert man, “Why’d you ruin my good tea kettle?”

The desert man replies, “Man, you gotta kill these things when they’re small.”

*

So God Made A Dog…..

Daily Wisecracks & Wisdom

A meeting is an event
where minutes are taken and hours are lost.
Anonymous

Cat & Dog Opinions

THE SPHINX—EARLY DEMOCRAT CANDIDATE

DENMARK DOES MORE UNAUTHORIZED SURGERIES THAN AMERICAN SCHOOL SYSTEMS WITH UNION TEACHERS.

https://nypost.com/2026/01/16/world-news/greenlanders-speak-out-against-danish-rule-they-stole-our-future/

https://www.diis.dk/en/research/why-is-greenland-part-of-the-kingdom-of-denmark-a-short-history

*****

Arrest Frey and Walz, they are probably hoping that the 9 Billion fraud will be forgotten in the mess.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/scott-mcclallen/2026/01/16/doj-investigating-tim-walz-jacob-frey-n2669630

Maybe they are seeking attention.

https://www.breitbart.com/crime/2026/01/16/police-minnesota-childcare-worker-18-arrested-for-smothering-two-children-on-the-same-day-killing-one/

*****

Baby Trump on the beach.

Colleges are breeding grounds for hate and Socialism.

https://nypost.com/2026/01/08/us-news/universities-cut-over-9000-jobs-in-2025-as-trump-targets-federal-funding-report/

FAFO—-I like watching the criminals who support illegal Democrat immigrant killers get cuffed.

https://nypost.com/2026/01/16/us-news/florida-anti-ice-agitator-jennifer-cruz-arrested-after-allegedly-punching-florida-trooper/

Another.    Give him 10 years in prison.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/dmitri-bolt/2026/01/16/pam-bondi-person-who-leaked-the-operation-in-venezuela-is-behind-bars-n2669527

Another.

https://redstate.com/sister-toldjah/2026/01/16/dhs-announces-arrest-of-armed-rioter-in-minnesota-n2198204

More.

https://pjmedia.com/catherinesalgado/2026/01/16/minneapolis-anti-ice-riots-escalate-in-violence-n4948390

*****

HEALTH

Fentanyl deaths have dropped.

https://pjmedia.com/vodkapundit/2026/01/13/how-would-you-like-some-good-news-about-fentanyl-n4948226

Democrats/Progressives are mentally ill.    XX—XY  are the choices.

https://redstate.com/wardclark/2026/01/13/plaintiffs-attorney-tops-kbjs-bizarre-word-salads-on-first-day-of-trans-athletes-case-n2198090

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/dmitri-bolt/2026/01/13/scotus-oral-arguments-men-in-womens-sports-n2669399

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/mattvespa/2026/01/13/fox-news-greg-gutfeld-has-a-thought-exercise-that-wrecks-the-fake-empathy-liberal-n2669367

MEDIA

Apple is a Democrat-Progressive company.

https://pjmedia.com/chris-queen/2026/01/13/apple-news-shut-out-conservatives-all-december-thats-not-an-accident-n4948232

MISCELLANEOUS

Lori is a good Democrat.

https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2026/01/13/bank-sues-former-chicago-mayor-lori-lightfoot-refusing-pay-bill-17-months/

Is Rubio thinking of his next job ?

https://i0.wp.com/tolleystopics.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/01/01KEYFP69XXYKDZ16617R9P9YS.jpeg?w=290&ssl=1

Fetterman is better than 5 Republican Senators.

https://pjmedia.com/matt-margolis/2026/01/14/democrats-might-kick-john-fetterman-out-of-the-party-for-this-n4948308

The HOR IT guy is a thief.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/scott-mcclallen/2026/01/14/house-committee-it-staffer-charged-with-stealing-240-government-phones-worth-150k-n2669461

The CPSC withdraws accreditation from 4 Chinese labs.

https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2026/01/15/exclusive-consumer-product-safety-commission-withdraws-accreditation-four-chinese-testing-labs/

*****

Mamdinky.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/amy-curtis/2026/01/16/mamdani-racial-equity-n2669591

https://nypost.com/2026/01/16/us-news/nyc-faces-12b-budget-deficit-not-seen-since-2008-financial-crisis-new-comptroller-warns-as-mamdani-uses-dire-forecast-to-push-taxing-the-rich/

*****

The Way Too Early Editor:    Have you already selected a Democrat Presidential favorite, LL ?

The Vote Early And Often Cat:   I didn’t select this sleeper candidate, the American Democrats decided who was best.  They will select him like Kamala in 2024 when she was selected without a single delegate vote.

https://babylonbee.com/news/maduro-now-polling-as-most-popular-democrat

Rumor has it that Joey picked Kamala without any help.   She then picked Tampon Tim, the Governor of Minnesota, for VP.   Tim’s entire state is overflowing with fraud.  He is ignorant of any criminal activity.   The Babylon Bee has listed some jobs he is qualified for.

https://babylonbee.com/news/7-perfect-new-jobs-for-tim-walz

A great job for Tim, begins at 3:01

Buy your food at 7-11.

https://genesiustimes.com/leftists-protest-new-maha-food-pyramid-by-staging-processed-carbs-only-sit-in-marathon/

https://www.duluthnewstribune.com/

*****

Maybe Governor of Minnesota would be a fit.

https://babylonbee.com/news/white-house-announces-over-1000000-new-jobs-were-created-in-december-but-they-were-all-filled-by-marco-rubio

https://www.breitbart.com/

Astronomy Picture of the Day

Jupiter from the Webb Space Telescope
Image Credit: NASA, ESA, CSA, Jupiter ERS Team; Processing: Ricardo Hueso (UPV/EHU) & Judy Schmidt

Explanation: This infrared view of Jupiter by Webb is illuminating. High-resolution infrared images of Jupiter from the James Webb Space Telescope (Webb) reveal, for example, differences between high-floating bright clouds — including the Great Red Spot — and low-lying dark clouds. Also clearly visible in the featured Webb image are Jupiter’s dust ring, bright auroras at the poles, and Jupiter’s moons Amalthea and Adrastea. The footprint of large volcanic moon Io‘s magnetic funneling of charged particles onto Jupiter is also visible in the southern aurora. Some objects are so bright that light noticeably diffracts around Webb’s optics creating streaks. Webb, which orbits the Sun near the Earth, has a mirror over six meters across making it the largest astronomical telescope ever launched — with over six times more light-collecting area than Hubble.

Tomorrow’s picture: interstellar garlic

Bible Verse