Patriot Post Memes

Daily Wisecracks & Wisdom

The worst part of online shopping is having
to get up and get your credit card from your purse.
Anonymous

Fun Facts: Really? Part 9

Coral is actually an animal, not a plant.

Until 1992, it was not required for electrical appliances in Britain to be sold with plugs on the end of them. Often, consumers had to attach them themselves.

Colorado-based company Apollo Peak has created a wine for cats. It contains no alcohol and is made of catnip with beets to give it that red wine color. It comes in flavors like pinot meow and mosCATo.

Hitler had a pet alligator named Saturn. He died on May 22, 2020 at the age of 84.

In January of 2013, the finance minister of Zimbabwe announced that his country had only 217 dollars left in its bank account.

 

My Understanding of Californians


WRITTEN BY: SHEILA TOLLEY

I have noticed that a large number of people are implying, with bad jokes and anecdotes, that people from California are not real smart. I would like to state for the record that I disagree with that assessment.

Anyone who would build cities on the San Andreas Fault and in the path of the annual Santa Ana winds….and then fill those cities with Democrats…

is a Damn Genius.

 

True Sensitivity!

The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands.

The Instructor said, “Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you.  Walking is especially beneficial – it strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier.   Just pace yourself, make plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft surfaces, like a grass path.

Gentlemen, remember, you’re in this together.  It wouldn’t hurt you to go walking with her.   In fact, that shared experience would be good for you both.”

The room suddenly became very quiet as the men absorbed this information.  After a few moments a man at the back of the room, slowly raised his hand.

“Yes?” said the Instructor.

“I was just wondering if it would be all right if she carries a golf bag?

Brings a tear to your eye, doesn’t it?

THIS LEVEL OF SENSITIVITY CAN’T BE TAUGHT.

 

Funny Golf Jokes for Women - Funny Jokes

 

THE SPHINX—VICTIM OF THE WEEK

Congo has a large Ebola outbreak.

https://www.breitbart.com/europe/2026/07/30/fastest-growing-ebola-outbreak-in-history-swamps-congo-as-death-toll-hits-1500/

*****

Trump on Fauci.

https://redstate.com/kyle-becker/2026/07/30/president-trumps-response-to-fauci-testimony-is-lighting-the-internet-on-fire-n2204941

*****

Dulles Airport to get 22 billion in renovations.

https://redstate.com/bobhoge/2026/07/29/making-air-travel-great-again-trump-announces-massive-renovation-for-dc-area-airport-n2204933

*****

Lindell doesn’t look like a good choice.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/mattvespa/2026/07/29/trump-endorsed-mike-lindell-he-might-have-to-smother-it-with-a-pillow-n2680280

*****

A squirrel invades a MLB game.

https://nypost.com/2026/07/27/sports/squirrel-invades-tigers-orioles-game-and-grounds-crew-is-powerless-to-stop-it/

*****

Vote Democrat, let’s get the caravans started again up from South America and the World.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/scott-mcclallen/2026/07/26/democratic-socialists-co-chair-admits-platform-includes-open-borders-amnesty-n2680142

https://redstate.com/nick-arama/2026/07/26/dsa-co-chair-agenda-on-fox-n2204789

*****

Sell the joint.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/josephchalfant/2026/07/26/democrats-mortgage-headquarters-for-15-million-to-bail-out-of-their-financial-fiasco-n2680147

*****

Another elected official is indicted—great.

https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2026/07/26/33347772grand-jury-indicts-hawaii-lt-governor-for-covid-testing-play-to-pay-scheme/

*****

Another.

https://www.breitbart.com/crime/2026/07/26/fbi-most-wanted-32-million-covid-fraud-suspect-captured-in-jamaican-hideout/

*****

Wisconsin is a septic tank.

https://redstate.com/sister-toldjah/2026/07/28/tiffany-catches-hong-in-significant-whopper-n2204861

*****

The I’m Suzy Fly Me Editor:    Who is our poor victim this week, LL ?

The Trump Airport Cat:    The victim is anyone who flies United Airlines.   They are rude to disabled passengers and have TDS.

https://pjmedia.com/tim-o-brien/2026/07/18/united-airlines-panders-to-anti-trumpers-over-renamed-donald-j-trump-international-airport-n4955200

Hire someone who cares about their work, like National’s old ad with Judy.

Maybe it’s just a dream.

The Olympic Committee is protecting everyone.

https://genesiustimes.com/olympic-committee-mandates-victorian-era-bathing-suits-for-all-female-athletes-to-prevent-sexualization/

https://www.palmbeachpost.com/

*****

The Mullahs are crazy like a fox.

https://babylonbee.com/news/iran-foils-new-bombing-attack-by-disguising-itself-with-a-giant-q

https://www.newsmax.com/

Bible Verse

1 John 5:7 Inspirational Image