Well folks, it is that time of year again. The old hacking coughs that we all hate. Well Darling, I have good news for you. Paw Paw Garrett will fix you up!

I encourage you to try the recipe shown below to alleviate your hacking cough.

If it does not work after “taking roughly 1 oz. to suppress your cough”….fear not…you simply need to tweak the recipe a tiny bit.

1) Get yourself a bigger Mason jar…..the first 3 ingredients remain the same…..add bourbon until the new, bigger Mason Jar is full.

2) Call in and request a few more days off work….because you are really sick.

3) Ask someone to hide your cell phone.

4) Now relax, drink yourself silly! After all, a little Peppermint Candy, Honey and Lemon never hurt anyone.

5) When you wake up in a couple days, call in and be honest with your boss. Tell him that you took an entire bottle of cough syrup and your cough is totally suppressed. Let him know that “as soon as your head quits hurting and the room quits spinning” you will be back to work.

6) After all, any boss should understand that when your team loses on Sunday…..it causes terrible Monday Cough Attacks.

-Dr. Sheila Tolley-

 

A man from California was telling his buddy :

“You won’t believe what happened last night. My daughter walked into the living room and said:  Dad, cancel my allowance immediately, forget my college tuition loan, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out the window, take my TV and my laptop. Please take any of my jewelry to the Salvation Army or Cash Converters.  Then sell my car, take my house key away, and throw me out. Then disown me and never talk to me again.  And don’t forget to write me out of your will and leave my share to any charity you choose.”

“Holy Smokes,” replied the friend, “she actually said that?”

“Well, she didn’t put it quite like that. What she actually said was: