WRITTEN BY: SHEILA TOLLEY

The strangest thing happened to me this morning. It was before daylight. I was sound asleep. I was awakened by a bumbling, clanking noise. I could not decide which direction it was coming from. At first it seemed to be at my back door. When I headed in that direction, it shifted to the front door. I am not kidding here…then it appeared to be coming from the top of my house. The strange bumbling, clanking noise was coming from everywhere. 

Then, there was a louder bumble, clank, followed by silence. The silence was more scary than the noise.

I peeked out my window. OMG! What is that on my porch covered in blood?

I cracked my door open slightly, just enough to peek out.

My friend Karma scared the hell out of me when she raised her head and said:

“Damn, Sheila…you are a sound sleeper aren’t you?”

I said, “I am sorry Karma, come in here so we can get all that blood off you and call an ambulance.”

She replied, “Karma don’t bleed, crazy lady….this is red paint and I am exhausted. I have been painting Virginia RED. That is a big state, even when I am using my big brush.”

I offered my friend some coffee which she politely refused. She said, “This is my busy season and I have many missions to complete.”

I walked my friend  to her Karma-mobile and peeked inside. I asked, “What are you going to do with all that red paint?” She waved bye. I heard her exclaim as she drove out of sight:

“That paint is for GEORGIA, so y’all better get it RIGHT!”

As I waved bye to my friend…A mighty banner unfurled from her Karma-mobile, It was so huge it barely cleared the power lines. It read:

LET’S GO BRANDON!