Day: March 2, 2023
March
The Cynical Philosopher…
Just read that 4,153,237 people got married last year, not to cause any trouble but shouldn’t that be an even number?
Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body… men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight, live longer than the men who mention it.
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won’t cross the street to vote.
You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s your common sense leaving your body.
Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
Money talks …but all mine ever says is good-bye.
If you think nobody cares whether you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.
I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, “Here, fill this out?”
I can’t understand why women are okay that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, “Sag Harbor.”
My therapist said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations. I’m pretty sure she was hitting on me.
My 60 year kindergarten reunion is coming up soon and I’m worried about the 175 pounds I’ve gained since then.
Denny’s has a slogan, “If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us” If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!
The pharmacist asked me my birth date again today. I’m pretty sure she’s going to get me something.
On average, an American man will have sex two to three times a week. Whereas, a Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year. This is very upsetting news to me. I had no idea I was Japanese.
The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can be in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.
I think it’s pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.
Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!
The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Think of this; Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he was always drunk and in jail!
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Astronomy Picture of the Day
Unraveling NGC 3169
Image Credit & Copyright: Mike Selby & Mark Hanson
Explanation: Spiral galaxy NGC 3169 looks to be unraveling like a ball of cosmic yarn. It lies some 70 million light-years away, south of bright star Regulus toward the faint constellation Sextans. Wound up spiral arms are pulled out into sweeping tidal tails as NGC 3169 (left) and neighboring NGC 3166 interact gravitationally. Eventually the galaxies will merge into one, a common fate even for bright galaxies in the local universe. Drawn out stellar arcs and plumes are clear indications of the ongoing gravitational interactions across the deep and colorful galaxy group photo. The telescopic frame spans about 20 arc minutes or about 400,000 light-years at the group’s estimated distance, and includes smaller, bluish NGC 3165 at the right. NGC 3169 is also known to shine across the spectrum from radio to X-rays, harboring an active galactic nucleus that is the site of a supermassive black hole.
Tomorrow’s picture: pixels in space
Conservative Only MEMES
My Favorite MEME of the Day
THE SPHINX—99 44/100 PERCENT
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It might be you.
https://www.theonion.com/what-to-know-about-the-last-of-us-1850146691
https://www.phnompenhpost.com/
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I think I can, I think I can.
https://babylonbee.com/news/aides-brief-buttigieg-on-ohio-disaster-using-wooden-toy-train-set
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The Lather Editor: What is your title about, LL ?
The Bubbles Cat: It’s about old Ivory Soap commercials.
99 44/100 pure applies to much of my cat-life. If you have small children or neighbors within 1 mile of your fenced property you do NOT need a big dog. Any pit bull or mix is included. If a pet can kill you it is 99 44/100 percent certain that you don’t need it.
https://nypost.com/2023/02/23/dog-trainer-garret-wing-reveals-three-breeds-to-not-own/
Any politician who won’t support a better education for half the current costs, for your children, is a corrupt Democrat. The Democrats violate the 99 44/100 rule. They are that percent corrupt.
https://nypost.com/2023/02/23/anti-charter-ny-politicians-send-kids-to-60k-private-schools/
Almost all ads/commercials are deceptive and/or dangerous. The Ivory Rule was made for them.
Kathy loves to fly, on a government plane, paid for by taxpayers. She should have to report it as income. She is a traveling woman. She fits the Ivory Rule.
Lightfoot loses reelection bid. So long Lori.
https://nypost.com/2023/02/28/chicago-mayor-lori-lightfoots-fate-in-doubt-as-polls-close/
Early reports say she will be working for Snap-On tools.
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Israel will bomb them. Sure, it is Trump’s fault.
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/iran-make-material-nuclear-device-12-days-us/story?id=97536371
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America’s government has sold us out to the Chinese.
https://twitter.com/VigilantFox/status/1630380412802400257
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Billions of dollars in electric-charging stations is the next scam. Let’s see what government employees have stock in the companies. No one is going to spend hours charging at a public station.
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North Carolina is improving. England is waking up.
https://nypost.com/2023/02/25/university-of-north-carolina-cancels-woke-diversity-in-hiring/
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It is and will continue to be covered up.
Maybe his actions will harm the Democrats reelections.
https://townhall.com/tipsheet/katiepavlich/2023/02/27/buttigieg-private-jets-investigation-n2620028
It’s a fuster cluck. Go to Vermont.
https://nypost.com/2023/02/28/cavinder-twins-mock-ncaa-following-first-nil-punishment/
https://www.newsmax.com/newsfront/vermont-christian-girls/2023/02/27/id/1110403/
Poor John.
C-SPAN is a woke non-profit.
Trains are crashing everywhere.
https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2023/02/28/train-carrying-propane-derails-florida-manatee-county/
Patriot Post MEMES
HAPPY to just be ALIVE!
Black and White
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