Archive | March 24, 2020

Horses Asses

( I could have titled this Horses Patoots or Horses Buttocks…..but you would not have clicked on it….so just enjoy!)

A farmer got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding, and the trooper started to lecture the farmer about his speed, and in general began to throw his weight around to try to make the farmer uncomfortable.

Finally, the trooper got around to writing out the ticket, and as he was doing that he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head.

The farmer said, “Having some problems with circle flies there, are ya?”

The trooper stopped writing the ticket and said: “Well yeah, if that’s what they are — I never heard of circle flies.”

So the farmer says, “Well, circle flies are common on farms. See, they’re called circle flies because they’re almost always found circling around the back end of a horse.”

The trooper says, “Oh,” and goes back to writing the ticket. Then after a minute he stops and says, “Hey … wait a minute, are you trying to call me a horse’s ass?”

The farmer says, “Oh no, officer. I have too much respect for law enforcement and police officers to even think about calling you a horse’s ass.”

The trooper says, “Well, that’s a good thing,” and goes back to writing the ticket.

After a long pause, the farmer says,

“Hard to fool them circle flies though.”

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Statistics Are Interesting…..

1910 Ford

Make sure you read all the statistics under the photo.

This has only been 110 years ago…Amazing!!!

Show this to your friends, children and/or grandchildren!

The year is 1910, over one hundred years ago. What a difference a century makes!

Here are some statistics for the Year 1910:

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The average life expectancy for men was 47 years.

Fuel for this car was sold in drug stores only.

Only 14 percent of the homes had a bathtub.

Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone.

There were only 8,000 cars and only 144 miles of paved roads.

The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 mph.

The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower !

The average US wage in 1910 was 22 cents per hour.

The average US worker made between $200 and $400 per year.

A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per year,

A dentist $2,500 per year, a veterinarian between $1,500 and $4,000 per year,

And a mechanical engineer about $5,000 per year.

More than 95 percent of all births took place at HOME.

Ninety percent of all Doctors had NO COLLEGE EDUCATION!

Instead, they attended so-called medical schools,

Many of which were condemned in the press AND by the government as ‘substandard.’

Sugar cost four cents a pound.

Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen.

Coffee was fifteen cents a pound.

Most women only washed their hair once a month, and used Borax or egg yolks for shampoo.

There was no such thing as under arm deodorant or tooth paste.

Canada passed a law that prohibited poor people from entering into their country for any reason.

The five leading causes of death were:

1. Pneumonia and influenza

2. Tuberculosis

3. Diarrhea

4. Heart disease

5. Stroke

The American flag had 46 stars.

The population of Las Vegas Nevada was only 30!

Crossword puzzles, canned beer, and iced tea hadn’t been invented yet

There was no Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.

Two out of every 10 adults couldn’t read or write and only 6 percent of all Americans had graduated from high school.

Eighteen percent of households had at least one full-time servant or domestic help.

There were about 230 reported murders in the ENTIRE U.S.A. !

(yes, people have changed)

I am now going to forward this to someone else without typing it myself.

From there, it will be sent to others all over the WORLD…all in a matter of seconds!

Try to imagine what it may be like in another 100 years.

Image result for what will a car look like in 100 years

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The Debutante Ball

Image result for The Debutante Ball clip art

A US Navy cruiser anchored in Mississippi for a week’s shore leave.

The first evening, the ship’s Captain received the following note from the wife of a very wealthy and influential plantation owner:

“Dear Captain, Thursday will be my daughter’s Debutante Ball.

I would like you to send four well-mannered, handsome, unmarried officers in their formal dress uniforms to attend the dance.”

“They should arrive promptly at 8:00 PM prepared for an evening of polite Southern conversation.

They should be excellent dancers, as they will be the escorts of lovely refined young ladies.

One last point: “No Jews please.”

Sending a written message by his own yeoman, the captain replied:

“Madam, thank you for your invitation.

In order to present the widest possible knowledge base for polite conversation, I am sending four of my best and most prized officers.”

“One is a lieutenant commander, and a graduate of Annapolis with an additional Masters degree from MIT in fluid technologies and ship design.”

“The second is a Lieutenant, one of our helicopter pilots, and a graduate of Northwestern university in Chicago, with a BS in Aeronautical Engineering.
His Masters Degree and PhD in Aeronautical and Mechanical Engineering are from Texas Tech University and he is also an astronaut candidate.”

“The third officer is also a lieutenant, with degrees in both computer systems and information technology from SMU and he is awaiting notification on his Doctoral Dissertation from Cal Tech.”

“Finally, the fourth officer, also a lieutenant commander, is our ship’s doctor, with an undergraduate degree from the University of
Georgia and his medical degree is from the University of North Carolina .

We are very proud of him, as he is also a senior fellow in Trauma Surgery at Bethesda .”

Upon receiving this letter, Melinda’s mother was quite excited and looked forward to Thursday with pleasure.

Her daughter would be escorted by four handsome naval officers without peer (and the other women in her social circle would be insanely jealous).

At precisely 8:00 PM on Thursday, Melinda’s mother heard a polite rap at the door which she opened to find, in full dress uniform, four very
handsome, smiling Black officers.

Her mouth fell open, but pulling herself together, she stammered, “There must be some mistake.”

“No, Madam,” said the first officer.

“Captain Goldberg never makes mistakes.”

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THE SPHINX—-LOOKOUT

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https://dailycaller.com/2020/03/21/fda-approves-cepheid-coronavirus-test-45-minutes/

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/bethbaumann/2020/03/22/fema-adminstrator-businesses-have-stepped-up-to-fight-the-wuhan-coronavirus-with-n2565451

https://www.oann.com/supporters-say-they-trust-president-trumps-response-to-coronavirus-pandemic/

https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2020/03/22/who-covers-for-china-amid-virus-outbreak-not-contagious-among-humans/

https://townhall.com/

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The Editor:  Is this about Lookout Mountain, LL ?

https://www.lookoutmountain.com/

See Seven States Cat:  No, but that is a good idea.  See your local sights instead of any Disney property.  Look out for this.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-8135093/Huge-chunk-Yellowstone-National-Park-size-Chicago-breathing-out.html

https://www.vox.com/2014/9/5/6108169/yellowstone-supervolcano-eruption

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfIBVlCo2NI

This was a great explosion.

https://www.britannica.com/place/Krakatoa

This is an old eruption.

https://www.history.com/topics/ancient-history/pompeii

https://historydaily.org/photos-of-pompeii

TE:  The big eruptions sure do look dangerous, SSSC.

They are.  If the Yellowstone Caldera blew the FBI & CIA might detect it, unless they were busy forging evidence.

TE:  If you can’t find hand sanitizers, and at least a 70 percent alcohol content by volume is needed to kill the contagions will two ( 2 ) shots of forty ( 40 ) percent vodka by volume work ?

Vodka Cat:  Two of those shots wouldn’t work.  Wash your hands often, and stay away from crowds.  Don’t waste the vodka.

https://www.delish.com/cooking/recipe-ideas/a29091466/white-russian-cocktail-recipe/

https://www.kahlua.com/us/kahlua-news/how-we-make-kahlua/