“Oh yeah…we know that Joe has been stealing others MoJo since a very long time ago. I would not be surprised if his next speech goes like this:
‘I was just asking Corn Pop on the way over here….Do you remember when I created the heaven and the earth, the earth was without form and darkness was everywhere. I told you then, Corn Pop…that we needed light and I demanded light. And there was light. And I saw the light, and it was good. I divided the light from the darkness.’
At this point, Joe’s amphetamines will wear off and he will nod off for a few moments. Then he will awaken and close his speech with this:
‘I was just thinking on the way over here…Ask not what your country can do, C’mon man…the deer stops here. Give me liberty or that is why the chicken crossed the road. Being Gay is OK. The Michelin Man is gay. If he denies it he is a lying pony-faced dog pigeon.
My VP nominee, Elizabeth Warren will now speak. C’mon up, Kamala!’
If a dude pretends to be a woman, you are required to pretend with him.
Somehow it’s un-American for the census to count how many Americans are in America.
Russians influencing our elections are bad, but illegal Mexicans voting in our elections are good.
It was cool for Joe Biden to “blackmail” the President of Ukraine, but it’s an impeachable offense if Donald Trump inquires about it.
Twenty is too young to drink a beer, but eighteen is old enough to vote.
People who have never owned slaves should pay slavery reparations to people who have never been slaves. This after 250,000 white union soldiers died to free the slaves and the subsequent freed slaves have already been given 40 acres and a mule to stimulate their life of freedom.
Inflammatory rhetoric is outrageous, but harassing conservative people in restaurants is virtuous.
People who have never been to college should pay the debts of college students who took out huge loans for useless degrees.
Immigrants with tuberculosis and polio are welcome, but you’d better be able to prove your dog is vaccinated.
Irish doctors and German engineers who want to immigrate must go through a rigorous vetting process, but any illiterate Central-American gang-banger who jumps the southern fence is welcome.
$5 billion for border security is too expensive, but $1.5 trillion for free health care is not.
If you cheat to get into college you go to prison, but if you cheat to get into the country you go to college for free.
People who say there is no such thing as gender are demanding a female President.
We see other countries going Socialist and collapsing, and it seems like a great plan to us.
Some people are held responsible for things that happened before they were born, and other people are not held responsible for what they are doing right now.
Criminals are catch-and-released to hurt more people, but stopping them is bad because it’s a violation of THEIR rights.
And pointing out all this hypocrisy somehow makes us “racists”?!