Archive | May 3, 2021

FOR THOSE OF US WHO REMEMBER Hollywood Squares:

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These great questions and answers are from the days when ‘ Hollywood Squares’ game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.

 

Q. Do female frogs croak?

A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you’re going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?

A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.

A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You’ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?

A. Don Knotts: That’s what’s been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he’s married?

A. Rose Marie: No. Wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?

A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say ‘I Love You’?

A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are ‘Do It,’ ‘I Can Help,’ and ‘I Can’t Get Enough’?

A. George Gobel: I don’t know, but it’s coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?

A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I’ll give you a gesture you’ll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell’s Angels wear leather?

A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you’ve just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?

A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I’m too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what’s a perfect score?

A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two topics at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?

A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?

A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I’m always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?

A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?

A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?

A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?

A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?

A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn’t neglected.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?

A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?

A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?

A. Charley Weaver: I’ll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions.  What are they?

A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?

A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.

Q. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat?

A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness!

(The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!)

JUST REMEMBER: WE DON’T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE WE GROW OLD,  WE GROW OLD BECAUSE WE STOP LAUGHING.

THE SPHINX—GOVERNMENT

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I keep hearing about the trillions to be spent on infrastructure.  I want to hear Nancy, Schumer, and Joe say it is written in the law that only American laborers and American materials will be used.

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Congratulations to The Ghost of Qasem Soleimani on his choice, Medina Spirit, winning the derby.

https://twitter.com/hashtag/DerbyAtHome?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

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Cops save Black juvenile.

https://redstate.com/jeffc/2021/05/01/mother-of-chicago-gunshot-victim-praises-officers-who-saved-her-son-n372486

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I apologize for missing this earlier.  The cancel-culture may not like a little history–all the liberals sux.

https://redstate.com/bradslager/2021/04/30/dipsology-beyond-the-basics-racing-thoroughbreds-and-sipping-corn-the-derby-means-bourbon-n371531

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Joe and Hunter are taxpayer-money-sucking-swamp-creatures.  After the Awakening their fortune will be taken away ( by law ) and given to Veteran Organizations.

https://nypost.com/2021/04/30/hunter-biden-continues-to-invest-in-equity-firm-linked-to-chinas-central-bank/

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DeSantis is a good American.

https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2021/04/30/florida-passes-election-integrity-bill-restricting-vote-by-mail-enhancing-voter-id-requirements/

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Manchin ( D-WV ) might save America.

https://redstate.com/nick-arama/2021/04/25/manchin-throws-a-body-block-to-bidens-effort-to-blow-up-our-constitutional-system-n368849

They should change their motto to “Only the best lies-Our founders were slave owners.”

https://nypost.com/2021/04/26/the-new-york-times-is-retiring-the-word-op-ed/

https://www.frc.org/get.cfm?i=PV20G09

https://www.breitbart.com/

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China loves LeBron and the NBA.

https://www.breitbart.com/sports/2021/04/26/china-applauds-return-nba-urges-undertake-lobbying-china-u-s/

https://redstate.com/

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The Investigative Editor:  Is the government getting more corrupt, LL ?

Secret Location Cat:  Most of them are as crooked as  Lombard/Vermont streets in San Francrookedoh. Anyone who has read The Sphinx for the past 6 years knows Seth Rich was killed by someone involved with the Democrat National Committee ( DNC ).  Rich stole the DNC records and released them.  He had access.  The DNC hired an outside firm to investigate the computer file theft.  The firm said it wasn’t hacked, but was an inside job.  The DNC wouldn’t let the FBI investigate.

https://www.oann.com/fbi-someone-couldve-paid-for-seth-richs-murder-releases-seth-rich-files/

Here is another lawbreaker with an attitude.  Maybe Ole Gretchen will set him free, and give him justice.  I didn’t see a face mask.  This is funny.  Free the drunk,  free the drunk,  free the drunk.  Kidnap him.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/leahbarkoukis/2021/04/26/michigan-state-rep-drunk-driving-arrest–whitmer-n2588522

https://redstate.com/wag/2020/10/10/the-ransom-of-gretchen-whitmer-n261979

Planned Parenthood gets at least $500 million in tax money each year.

https://redstate.com/mike_miller/2021/04/26/the-babylon-bee-blisters-planned-parenthood-with-planned-parenthood-n368952

https://babylonbee.com/news/planned-parenthood-distances-themselves-from-margaret-sanger-by-continuing-her-legacy

Biden selects Cuomo to represent him at conference call on COVID 19.  You go Joe.

https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2021/04/26/report-biden-has-andrew-cuomo-lead-white-house-covid-calls-with-governors/

Here is another Joe, dedicating a song for mayors and governors that don’t enforce the law.

 

Good Stuff

Ask and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock and the door will be opened for you. –Jesus

The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. –Ralph Waldo Emerson

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. –Henry David Thoreau

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me. –Erma Bombeck

Few things can help an individual more than to place responsibility on him, and to let him know that you trust him. –Booker T. Washington

 

Astronomy Picture of the Day

Apollo 11: Earth, Moon, Spaceship
Image Credit: NASA, Apollo 11; RestorationToby Ord

Explanation: After the most famous voyage of modern times, it was time to go home. After proving that humanity has the ability to go beyond the confines of planet Earth, the first humans to walk on another world — Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin — flew the ascent stage of their Lunar Module back to meet Michael Collins in the moon-orbiting Command and Service Module. Pictured here on 1969 July 21 and recently digitally restored, the ascending spaceship was captured by Collins making its approach, with the Moon below, and Earth far in the distance. The smooth, dark area on the lunar surface is Mare Smythii located just below the equator on the extreme eastern edge of the Moon’s near side. It is said of this iconic image that every person but one was in front of the camera.

Tomorrow’s picture: another triple alignment